When a young adult feels stuck, it affects the whole family
If your adult son or daughter is having a hard time finding their footing with work, independence, or what comes next, it can be painful and confusing for everyone involved. Many families quietly worry about the future while doing their best to stay supportive in the present. If this sounds familiar, you are not alone and this kind of stuckness is far more common than most people realize.
Learn more about therapy for Failure to Launch
If you would like to talk about how therapy could help, we are here.
Call or text (650) 461-9026 or book online to get started.
In person and video appointments are available.
What failure to launch can look like
This term describes a pattern where an adult child is having difficulty moving into independent adulthood. Families often notice things like feeling stuck around work, career, or next steps, living at home or staying closely connected to family while independence feels hard, wanting things to change but not knowing how to begin, pulling back from friends, dating, or social life, difficulty following through on goals or routines, and a growing sense of worry, frustration, or uncertainty within the family.
None of this means someone is not capable or motivated. In most cases it means they are feeling overwhelmed by anxiety, depression, self doubt, or other emotional or mental health challenges that make it hard to see how to move forward.
Understanding what is really going on
Failure to launch is not about laziness or a lack of ability. It is usually a sign that the transition into adult life feels emotionally or mentally overwhelming. When anxiety, low mood, perfectionism, trauma, or neurodivergent traits are present, even simple steps can feel heavy and intimidating. Pulling back can become a way of coping with those feelings.
Parents often step in out of love and concern. Over time this can create a pattern where everyone feels stuck, not because anyone has done something wrong, but because the balance between support and independence has become difficult to find. The good news is that this balance can be restored.
If this sounds like what is happening in your family, you may want to read our main page on failure to launch and how therapy can help. Learn more about therapy for Failure to Launch
Different ways adults can feel stuck
There is not one single path into failure to launch. Some people struggle with anxiety and hesitation, worrying about making mistakes, disappointing others, or falling behind. Others have executive functioning challenges where planning, organizing, and getting started feels overwhelming even when the desire to move forward is there. Some young adults stay very emotionally connected to their parents as they build confidence in their own abilities. Others deal with perfectionism and procrastination where high standards make it hard to begin. Social withdrawal is also common when someone feels behind their peers. In many cases there are underlying mental health or neurodivergent factors such as depression, ADHD, OCD, trauma, or autism spectrum traits that add layers of complexity to this stage of life.
No matter the reason, feeling stuck is not permanent
How Palo Alto Therapy supports growth and independence
At Palo Alto Therapy we work with young adults and their families to create a thoughtful and supportive path toward greater confidence and independence. We help adult children build skills and momentum while also helping parents find a healthier balance between caring and letting go.
Young adults are supported through cognitive behavioral therapy to learn how to work with anxious or self critical thoughts, take manageable steps forward, and build confidence through real world action. Parents are supported through approaches informed by supportive parenting for anxious childhood emotions to adjust how they respond to stuck patterns so they can encourage independence while staying emotionally connected. When helpful we also offer family therapy to improve communication and clarify expectations around finances, responsibilities, and living arrangements in a way that feels respectful and collaborative.
A hopeful next step
Being stuck does not mean something is wrong. It means support is needed. With the right guidance adult children can move forward and families can feel hopeful again.
If you would like to talk about how therapy could help, we are here.
Call or text (650) 461-9026 or book online to get started.
In person and video appointments are available.